letter the fifteenth: question answered

I've always wondered why some spam e-mails were so poorly written.  I mean, you would think they would snare in more people if PayPal wasn't spelled pay pall or the syntax makes no sense whatsoever (e.g. An inn when he suddenly noticed).

I've discovered why they do that: only three people have a grasp of the English language. Take this request for a small classified ad for example.

Hello,
I am writing to place an ad for pet and i want it online and in newspaper. I can make prepayment with a credit card. Please email me back and let me know what you need for my ad.
HERE IS MY AD COPY : 2 AKC registered puppies free to good home, . They have current shorts and play along with children and other animals. contact ([E-MAIL ADDRESS]) for more information.
Above is my ad copy and i will like the ad to run for just 7 days in all your pappers and online.
The reason why i want to give the dogs away is because, i'm relocating to a new apartment and my new landlord does not accept animal so i have to find a good home for them.
I await your e-mail.
Thank you



The person who forwarded this said the e-mail went straight to the spam folder that he just happened to be checking. He figured it was a scam anyway, since most free puppy ads wind up meaning "I don't know how to take care of animals but I don't want the horrible death of this one to be on my hands. Take this free $50,000 vet bill!"

Since the e-mail address isn't obviously one for a newspaper (the contributor's pseudo-private e-mail address that is only posted in the physical paper) and the sender mentioned that it was a newspaper, the contributor is going with there is a real-live person behind this. I'm going with that too. So I can make fun of the e-mail.

It starts out fine: you want an ad and you're willing to pay for it. You just bought me one more day before the layoffs. I really hope you don't want to do this completely by e-mail but, if so, it's your credit card number you're willing to e-mail it to us, it's your identity.

We're glad you want out feedback for your ad. We're also glad your puppies have current shorts. The last thing anyone needs are puppies in things that were so two years ago.

We also value your explanation on why you want to give the dogs away. We really care. Really. We always ask why people sell things on the classified page. If we think you're a prick trying to pawn off two terrors to someone, the ad is off.  But you need a good home for the puppies. We'll be delighted to put them in our pappers. We'll even put them in the papers as well but it'll cost you more.